Hey.
It's been awhile, I know. Sorry about that. I've been living a very insane life lately.
I have a ton of new friends, reconnected with some old ones, and have held to my good ones as well.
I've been living, though. Truly living.
I'm not sure how to explain it, except just by saying I am experiencing things for the first time. It's not necessarily that I'm just now trying these specific things, but rather, I am finally allowing myself to soak it in.
I have no idea what I want. I have no idea who I am. I am however, learning.
I'm learning to fall in love without thinking. I'm learning how to be confident and daring and excitable. I'm learning how to be level-headed without overthinking all the little things.
Best of all, I'm smiling a thousand times more than I did six months ago.
I'm going to allow someone to love me. And I intend on loving him right back.
I'm going to try more sushi, make random friends, and jump into life head first.
Wanna know why?
...I'm growing.
That's all. I'm finally growing up.
I have made literally hundreds of mistakes, I've hurt myself and others, and I've ruined many wonderful things. But I don't regret any of it. I'm becoming who I was made to be. If it takes my heart getting destroyed again, then that's gonna happen. If I have to let go of someone or something in order to be happy, I'm willing to do so.
This is it.
I've finally figured out who I wanna be. And now I just have to get there.
Here's to the many mistakes to come, and the many lessons to learn.
PS - Nothing good happens after 9pm. Ever.
